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The Pickwick Papers 233







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to buy three pound of red kidney pertaties, which was three pound tuppence hapenny, when I see Mrs. Bardells street door on the jar. On the what? exclaimed the little judge. Partly open, my Lord, said Serjeant Snubbin. She said on the jar, said the little judge, with a cunning look. Its all the same, my Lord, said Serjeant Snubbin. The little judge looked doubtful, and said hed make a note of it. Mrs. Cluppins then resumed-- I walked in, gentlemen, just to say good-mornin, and went, in a permiscuous manner, upstairs, and into the back room. Gentlemen, there was the sound of voices in the front room, and-- And you listened, I believe, Mrs. Cluppins? said Serjeant Buzfuz. Beggin your pardon, Sir, replied Mrs. Cluppins, in a majestic manner, I would scorn the haction. The voices was very loud, Sir, and forced themselves upon my ear, Well, Mrs. Cluppins, you were not listening, but you heard the voices. Was one of those voices Pickwicks? Yes, it were, Sir. And Mrs. Cluppins, after distinctly stating that Mr. Pickwick addressed himself to Mrs. Bardell, repeated by slow degrees, and by dint of many questions, the conversation with which our readers are already acquainted. The jury looked suspicious, and Mr. Serjeant Buzfuz smiled as he sat down. They looked positively awful when Serjeant Snubbin intimated that he should not cross-examine the witness, for Mr. Pickwick wished it to be distinctly stated that it was due to her to say, that her account was in substance correct. Mrs. Cluppins having once broken the ice, thought it a favourable opportunity for entering into a short dissertation on her own domestic affairs; so she straightway proceeded to inform the court that she was the mother of eight children at that present speaking, and that she entertained confident expectations of presenting Mr. Cluppins with a ninth, somewhere about that day six months. At this interesting point, the little judge interposed most irascibly; and the effect of the interposition was, that both the worthy lady and Mrs. Sanders were politely taken out of court, under the escort of Mr. Jackson, without further parley. Nathaniel Winkle! said Mr. Skimpin. Here! replied a feeble voice. Mr. Winkle entered the witness- box, and having been duly sworn, bowed to the judge with considerable deference. Dont look at me, Sir, said the judge sharply, in acknowledgment of the salute; look at the jury. Mr. Winkle obeyed the mandate, and looked at the place where he thought it most probable the jury might be; for seeing anything in his then state of intellectual complication was wholly out of the question. Mr. Winkle was then examined by Mr. Skimpin, who, being a promising young man of two or three-and-forty, was of course anxious to confuse a witness who was notoriously predisposed in favour of the other side, as much as he could. Now, Sir, said Mr. Skimpin, have the goodness to let his Lordship know what your name is, will you? and Mr. Skimpin inclined his head on one side to listen with great sharpness to the answer, and glanced at the jury meanwhile, as if to imply that he rather expected Mr. Winkles natural taste for perjury would induce him to give some name which did not belong to him. Winkle, replied the witness. Whats your Christian name, Sir? angrily inquired the little judge. Nathaniel, Sir. Daniel--any other name? Nathaniel, sir--my Lord, I mean. Nathaniel Daniel, or Daniel Nathaniel? No, my Lord, only Nathaniel--not Daniel at all. What did you tell me it was Daniel for, then, sir? inquired the judge. I didnt, my Lord, replied Mr. Winkle. You did, Sir, replied the judge, with a severe frown. How could I have got Daniel on my notes, unless you told me so, Sir? This argument was, of course, unanswerable. Mr. Winkle has rather a short memory, my Lord, interposed Mr. Skimpin, with another glance at the jury. We shall find means to refresh it before we have quite done with him, I dare say. You had better be careful, Sir, said the little judge, with a sinister look at the witness. Poor Mr. Winkle bowed, and endeavoured to feign an easiness of manner, which, in his then state of confusion, gave him rather the air of a disconcerted pickpocket. Now, Mr. Winkle, said Mr. Skimpin, attend to me, if you please, Sir; and let me recommend you, for your own sake, to bear in mind his Lordships injunctions to be careful. I believe you are a particular friend of Mr. Pickwick, the defendant, are you not? I have known Mr. Pickwick now, as well

The Pickwick Papers page 232        The Pickwick Papers page 234